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Sunday, July 24, 2011

The Love Tank

I have a tank I fill up every night with love. I fill it with prayer. Fill it to the brim so it will last through the day.

I awake each day and give the love out freely.

Sometimes we join to combine our love tanks. We trust and we extend and together create more love than our tanks can hold.

Sometimes people have built walls around their love tanks. Walls built with frustration, anger, hurt, shame, and longing.  Too many have stolen from their tanks and they're compelled to protect what's left. Each bit of anger puts another brick in the wall, then hurt puts mortar between the bricks, then shame paints it black.

We try to share our love tanks but arrows get shot up over their wall and sometimes they penetrate our tank leaving us with a pool of love at our feet that tastes like tears.

We mop the floor with hope and prayers and fill our tank back up.

Then the arrows of their hurt start to callous our tank with bits of built up fear. We continue to mop with prayers and hope but there's less room for the love that is replaced with the callouses of fear.

Day after day we pray for the walls to come down. We try to take them down and sometimes they go up stronger and thicker and the arrows get bigger and more direct. We mop the tears with prayers and love and we look to the Sky. We wait for the Power to tear down the walls before more fear moves in.

The fear tastes bad in the love tank.  It's the bitter that takes over the sweet. Not the bitter of lemon mixed with sugar like a shakeup at the fair, but the bitter that leaves you wiping your tongue and licking the sugar bowl trying to wipe it away. The kind that taints the sugar just a little bit more each time.  Like the bitter medicine that tastes worse the 3rd and 4th time because you know it's coming and you know a spoonful of sugar won't make this medicine go down.

Again patching the hole the arrow leaves, wiping the puddle of tears with hope and love.  Waiting for the Power to bring down the wall or just move a brick or two away so some of the love gets in.  Just enough to let the Light shine through. Just enough to let them taste how sweet it can be.

Maybe tomorrow we'll wake and the stone will be moved and the Light will shine and tears will flow. Maybe they'll be full of love and joy because they've overflowed with too much love, not the little that just leaked out.